Lord Jarritos De Tamarindo Does Some Road Maintenance: House of the Beast 8

LORD JARRITOS DE TAMARINDO swerves out of the BUTLER BEAST's clutches and careens towards the CANNIBAL-clustered MOUNTAIN PASS.

TIME TO MAKE WAY.

 


IT'S SUPER EFFECTIVE.

Corralled by the cramped confines of the chasm, the CANNIBALS crumble before the crippling cannonade! Chaos! Carnage! Other words that start with C! CANNIBALS are blasted to pieces, others are thrown through the air – several still alive – and redeposited in new and interesting places. The entire MOUNTAIN PASS is cleared in a single shot.

LORD JARRITOS roars down a highway paved with the viscera of his enemies and into the JUNGLE beyond.


Absolute chaos greets him. Men are pouring into the jungle from the field beyond the trees' edge – CANNIBALS and some other FOREIGN FACTION. Is that the GRAND MAN-EATER and his HELM OF ULTIMATE OVERCOMPENSATION?! BUT WAIT – to the right, the terrible roaring of THE STEVE fills the humid air – a host of PANTALOONIANS advances on the beast! Dead ahead, some kind of terrifying SERPENT WOMAN cries out from beneath the jungle leaves, urging her troops to join her.

 


What will LORD JARRITOS do?


1. Finish the Beast
Swerve to the right and unload your cannon straight into THE STEVE.

2. Clean out the riffraff
Tear onto the FIELD and start blasting the assorted CANNIBALS and other UNDESIRABLES.

3. That helm is mine
Blast the GRAND MAN-EATER and take his HELM OF ULTIMATE OVERCOMPENSATION.

4. Wildcard
Dump your gunpowder barrels and LIGHT THE JUNGLE ON FIRE before swerving onto the FIELD.

5. Not today, lady.
Blast that SNAKE WOMAN before she can do… whatever it is that she wants to do.

6. OTHER :_______________________

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